Check-in

As you are taking steps to bring more light and ease into your life, it can be helpful to schedule a weekly check-in. To take some time to look at the steps you committed to and see how you are doing.

To start with, decide when you will dedicate twenty to thirty minutes to yourself and to reviewing your practice. Make sure you can spend this time in an environment where it is easy for you to focus and turn your attention within.

You will need some of the notes you made before: the starfish, the steps and when you planned to take them, perhaps the visualisation if you did that exercise. You will also need a fresh piece of paper and a pen and, if you like, some music and a cup of tea or a glass of water.

Begin by making yourself comfortable. Bring your attention to the parts of your body that touch the ground and the surface you are sitting on. Relax your shoulders, your face, your eyes. Smile gently. Take a few deep breaths, slowly counting as you inhale: 1, 2, 3, 4 and as you exhale: 1, 2, 3, 4. Repeat a few times, extending the exhale to 5, 6, 7 and 8.

Breathe normally and look at the notes you brought. What actions did you plan to take this week? Can you tick them off? Is there a routine you planned to start? How is this going?

When you have taken the actions or started the new routine: well done. How does it feel? Allow yourself a minute to smile and enjoy this success. Although it might be too soon to notice any big shifts, your focus on the themes and topics is likely to have shifted something. Can you feel or see any differences? Take some notes. No need to write complete sentences or analyse anything, just some scribbles or bullet points are enough.

If the action you planned to take is still there on your to-do-list: not to worry. You don’t want this to happen every week, but there is no need to judge or be unkind to yourself. Simply be objective and look at what you did instead.

You choose to say ‘no’ to whatever action you promised to take and ‘yes’ to something else. What did you say ‘yes’ to? What was more important than doing what you meant to do? No need to judge, just look at the facts.

As we seek to create change in our lives, we will inevitably have to say ‘no’ while saying ‘yes’ would be so much easier. It takes practice, but it will become easier in time. It often helps to remind yourself why you are saying ‘no’. If perhaps you have to turn down a social invitation because you planned to redesign your website, go back to what the new website will help you achieve. This is where the visualisation might help. If you remember your destination and wonderful it will feel when you get there, it will become easier to say ‘no’.

In some cases, saying ‘no’ feels too daunting. Can you take a closer look at that feeling? Don’t push it if not. Perhaps you are coming up against something that is better explored with a coach or a therapist. But if you can, try to answer these questions: What do you think would have happened if you had said ‘no’? How bad would that have been? Are you sure it would have happened, or would a different scenario have been possible?

Hopefully, this exploration will help you keep the promise you made to yourself next time.

Now reschedule the actions that are still on your to-do-list and continue your check-in by looking at the steps you have planned for the week ahead. Is there any support you need in taking those steps? Do you need to clear extra time? Do you need a gentle reminder to keep your hoping machine running?

As you wrap up, take some time to look at the start and more of on your starfish. Take another few deep breaths, slowly counting as you inhale: 1, 2, 3, 4 and as you exhale: 1, 2, 3, 4. Repeat a few times, extending the exhale to 5, 6, 7 and 8.

Breathe normally and close your eyes for just a few minutes. Imagine what it feels like when all the things you wanted to start and do more of are there. They have become a natural part of your life. It feels good, doesn’t it? It feels like the sun warming your face. Enjoy that feeling. It is all yours. You deserve it. Allow yourself to smile. It is all good.

Now open your eyes, thank yourself for taking time to check-in and enjoy the rest of your day.